The 1000 Day Holiday

I am proud to announce the winners of the Worst Beers in the World, as sampled over the course of 1000 days.

354+ Beers were entered, some disqualified as if you can’t remember the name of them the next day its possible the beer is bad. (The Hangover Test).

3rd Place

Pineapple Beer. Not so good.

China produces a lot in this world. From crappy plastic toys covered in lead, to the very fine electronics you are likely sitting in front of right now.

Beer is no exception. These Pineapple beers are very low in alcohol, in fact the only reason they are included is because of the name.

Sweet yet disturbing, trying to describe the flavour development is difficult. Theres no hint of hops, maltyness or anything at all beer related.

2nd Place

Malawi’s Shake Shake was a strong contender for the worst beer awards. It had been holding 1st place since mid 2006.

Made from ground maize, milk products and yes you actually shake it to mix all the sediment up before drinking it. Its a bit of a mouthful.

Yet it also has some positive points.

Its nutritious and filling. Just think of alcoholic very runny porridge.

Yet still gets you drunk at lunchtime on a Monday with all the other locals that are loving the heavily distorted music pumping from the stereo. 1 Litre for $0.50 and think of all the nutritional benefits.

1st Place

If I told you to imagine a beer can that looks innocuous enough. The only hint trouble may be ahead is that its Lemon flavoured. You think how bad can it be?

Worst Beer in the World!

I can honestly say, I have never drunk less of a beer. Ever.

The first developing “Taste” is similar to what taking a few tablespoons of liquid salt into your mouth feels like.  There’s an instant gag reflex, and it really doesn’t provide that nice initial refreshing tingle that beer should.

The second stage of flavour comes in the form of “Lime” which tastes like lemon floor detergent smells.

I encouraged everyone in the hostel to sample it. Nobody wanted more than their first sip.

Beer + Salt + Lime in a can. Widely available in Mexico & Costa Rica. This whole genre of beer needs to be eradicated from the world.

Rock Ice with Lemon is announced as the winner of the Worst Beer In The World Contest. As judged by Moby on his 1000 Day Holiday.

Its a pretty weird feeling.

It seems like yesterday I was finishing work in Sydney. 30th December 2005. Me, about to embark on an odyssey. 2.5 years+. The longest trip I had done before this was 3 whole weeks.

1000 days later I’m back in Sydney. Now I’m on a bus to the Hunter Valley to surprise my parents. They think I’m in BC, Canada. Job/normal life hunting.

Trying to sum up the trip in a moment, eyes closed. Images of the last 1000 days flashing past  makes me realise it wasn’t yesterday. Its too big, I can’t actually do it.

Catching up with friends that I haven’t seen. Its like I’ve awoken from a coma. When I think of people as great mates, I realise I haven’t been a part of their lives for nearly 3 years. I hadn’t been to a wedding before starting this trip. Now I’ve been to a few, but missed far too many. Babies, houses and dogs are sprouting left and right. Its the small things though. The everyday, hanging out, knowing the score that I’ve missed.

There’s something that I have become increasingly aware of over the duration of the trip. As Christopher McCandless put it: “Happiness only real when shared”. Its a pretty strong statement. Yes you can be happy within yourself and regarding where and what you are doing. But being able to turn to someone standing next to you and share the experience. That’s it.

On the road, you are incredibly open. Other travellers become your instant family. Sharing experiences, love and life. To those I have hung out with, travelled with and explored this fine world with. It will be with me forever. Thankyou! Drop by and visit sometime.

To those from my past life. AKA the “real world”. I’m back, lets have some new adventures. From November 10 I’ll be in Canada and you’re invited.

This is Burning Man.

An inspiring video, I can’t wait for BM 2009!

Burning Man 2008 from Jason Mongue on Vimeo.

During our last errand before departure from Ukiah we spotted the locals setting up for the 10th annual Chili Cookoff. We had to stay. Events of this calibre only happen once a year.

Chili gets taken very seriously in these parts. Most of the town was in attendance. 33 stalls were competing for the grand title.

The full spectrum of chili had to be tasted. Beef, Vegetarian, Elk, Bison, not spicy right through to 95% hot chilli. We even were bribed to vote for a stall with beer vouchers. Unfortunately the voting was rigged and they closed the voting early, so our bribed votes were wasted.

While we were discussing the chili in front of the New Age church stand,25 stalls done, our bellies full, I mentioned that we should drink the Kool-Aid and try it out.

Alex and his friend both gave me a very funny look and asked why I said to drink the Kool-aid.

It turns out Jim Jones (Peoples temple) was based in Ukiah and had a church and many local followers.

So the next morning on the way out of town, we stopped in for some pictures.

We arrived in Brookings, Oregon and started to look for a place to stay.

A free-camping website for Oregon had recommended asking at the Police station for the closest/best place that free-camping is allowed so we went in to ask. The woman at the desk looked at us like we were crazy, and the only place she could recommend was the Mission out on the main road South.

We pulled up at the mission, a thrift store. A church next door. Alex and I grinned at each other knowing this was going to be an adventure.

The guy who ran the place came out, most of his teeth were missing. We explained we were directed here and were looking for somewhere to free-camp. He said he didn’t have any space to camp but you can sleep inside, and you might want to park your car out the back.

We got the grand tour, kitchen, lounge, sleeping space (being the aisles in the thrift shop), if you need blankets or anything just help yourself. There’s just 3 rules here: No drink, drugs or violence.

We had missed dinner, and it was a race to find the best spots in the Aisle. The Shoe area, and the end area behind the counters were already taken. So we bedded down in the aisle between the plates and the bowls.

I headed for Ukiah, CA where I was meeting Alex, a fellow CS’er whos road tripping around Oregon and Washington.

Packed and out the door, I’m totally looking forward to hitch hiking again. The last time was in South Africa in 2006!

RIDE 1 It took me 45 mins to get a ride offer at the on ramp to the Golden Gate Bridge. I didn’t realise the town he mentioned was not far over the bridge. But I was still glad to get off the mark.

He dropped me at a really nasty on ramp in Marin County. This is where all the affluent grandmas and their BMW’s live just north of the bridge. A bad bad place to hitch from.

45 Minutes, and I’m getting a little hot. 2 asian ladys stop in the middle of the on ramp to ask me where I’m going, almost causing an accident. Their English isn’t very good so I cant get much out of them about where they would drop me. So I decide to stay at the worlds worst hitching spot.

RIDE 1.a 60 minutes to the second and the guy who dropped me off pulls up and says he realised he dropped me in a really bad spot and he’ll take me further up the highway.

40 Miles later! He drops me at the Santa Rosa junction. We were having a great chat about kitesurfing & he was procrastinating on the other things he was supposed to do.

45 Mins waiting in the beating sun….

RIDE 2 A woman pulls up and offers me a ride to Windsor, its only 12 miles up the highway but its still on route, so I jump in. Quickly into conversation about her hitching trips across the states, she mentions shes on her way to Walmart for some clothing. Then checks the time and says Ukiah will have a bigger one so she’ll drive me all the way. An extra 120 Miles to her intended trip!

She drops me off at the corner where Alex’s house is supposed to be. But I cant find it. 3990 to the right, 4011 to the left. I spot a guy coming out of his garage, so approach up the driveway to ask if he knows… He comes out towards me and says

“I dont wan none of what youre selling, get outa ere”

“go on, get”

I explain I’m not selling anything, and that I’m looking for house #4001. He has no idea (hes 4020), So I walk back around the corner. In this process a F350 truck stops in the middle of the road, backs up to me and the guy leans out the window and asks me what I’m looking for with a lot of suspicion.

I say I’m looking for 4001, its not up there, its not back there, so it must be down this side street.

He looks at me and says “its not up there, thats my neighbour the browns.”

I walk up there anyway and find his house. next to the Browns

It turns out Alex’s place is in an area the locals call Oakey Flats. As in full of Oakland immigrants (‘rednecks’), and Ukiah is in the Green triangle of Northern California where all the marijuana is grown…

So all in all a strange but great day hitching. And after this story about greyhound, and my experience last year I had no desire to get back on a greyhound bus.